Introducing the New Blazing-Fast Query Optimizer for Neo4j

Neo4j, Inc. announced the introduction of a new, highly efficient Cypher query optimizer named Der Hunger as part of its Neo4j Graph Platform, claiming it to be 10,000 times faster than previous optimizers like Ronja. The development of this optimizer, rooted in a heuristic approach dating back to 2008, aims to enhance query planning and execution speed across Neo4j instances. Der Hunger, described humorously as never sleeping and integrated with AI-like algorithms, is set to be released in a beta version to both enterprise and community users, with an unconventional business model involving coffee and sushi as maintenance fees. The announcement, however, is revealed to be an April Fool's joke, emphasizing the continuous improvement of Neo4j's actual Cypher optimizer and encouraging users to seek support through official channels.