The text provides a critical analysis of how marketers and consultants exploit the DevOps Research and Assessment (DORA) metrics, which are designed to improve IT performance through cultural and systemic changes in organizations. Originally developed in collaboration with Puppet and later acquired by Google, DORA metrics have become integral to DevOps practices but are often misused by marketers and consultants who promise quick-fix solutions that don't address the necessary organizational changes. The author, drawing from personal experiences across various roles in tech, argues that these professionals frequently mislead businesses by framing their products or services as essential to improving DORA metrics, without truly facilitating the deep cultural shifts required. The piece calls for technical professionals to critically evaluate the claims made by marketers and consultants, emphasizing that real organizational change must originate internally rather than being outsourced or externally imposed.